If we dare to show up and lead,
then doubt, failure, fear, and vulnerability will be a given.
Feeling hard things while trying to stay true to your values, your vision, your important relationships, your health is part of the gig of leading.
You desire to stop:
all which threaten to level you every time change, growth, struggle, or failure show up.
You see these struggles in those you lead, too.
During my childhood in suburban Minneapolis and as an undergraduate at university in Iowa, I chased all things that would give me a sense of more power, control and worthiness, but I still felt like something was missing. The hustle was exhausting, though exhilarating, as I went on to work in Washington, DC for a United States Senator, in New York City for an issue advocacy advertising firm, and in Europe for an international youth outreach organization.
I left the corporate world and the security of the known and went back to graduate school at age 30. Everyone around me thought I was reckless, but they also knew that whenever I put my mind to something, I made it happen. And I did. Grad school was a period of refinement, integration, healing, inspiration, and so much hope.
Our culture and the personal + professional development field have led us astray on how to approach difficult emotions and beliefs that keep showing up, causing you to doubt yourself when recurring issues pop up. Your vast accomplishments and investment in personal work do not make you immune to these beliefs that fuel doubt, shame, and fear.
There is beauty in being reminded that there is not one feeling or negative mindset belief that we singularly experience. While our circumstances are unique, rumbling with difficult emotions and thoughts is universal.
This common humanity helps takes away the edge of feeling alone in a space of struggle, heartache, failure, frustration.
And feeling hard things while trying to stay true to your values, your vision, your important relationships, your health is part of the common humanity of leading.
However, being an imperfect, fallible human often does not feel like a strength or a unifying experience. It is a beast navigating the vulnerability of leading and caring deeply about your work and those who are relying on you.
Early on, I internalized the message that any sign of struggle was a reflection on my character, and therefore my safety and my value. Pursuing careers in politics and advertising taught me so much about power and how easy it was to be what others wanted me to be. Shoot, I learned that early on growing up in a volatile home and as a child of divorce.
Starting Potentia over a decade ago - my brick and mortar integrative mental health practice based in San Diego - brought everything full circle. It helped me apply all that I had learned in my previous careers while running a business, leading a team, and refining my skills around helping people and organizations. It was during this time I fell in love, got married, and started a family. My brilliant husband - an AP History teacher and retired ocean lifeguard - and my two children are my rock, my inspiration, and, to be honest, the source of my own feelings of overwhelm at times, too. :-) As a mother of a daughter on the autism spectrum, I have had to dig deep in my own personal practices of what I share with others. I teach this work because I believe in it and have seen how it has helped hundreds of people - including myself - live an integrated life and embrace Integrated Leadership™.
In addition to my clinical and leadership coaching work, I enjoy writing, teaching, and speaking (previously at amazing places like Yellow Co., Courage Camp - a conference for leaders trained in Brené Brown’s methodologies, the Center for Self Leadership International Conference, and at Troutman-Sanders West Coast Women's retreat). I have been a featured webinar guest with business thought leaders like Jason Van Orden and Gemma Went, and was a regular contributing mental health writer for Darling Media. I am a regular guest on podcasts for creatives, entrepreneurs, and those in the personal development fields. Check some of them out here, here, and here.
Through my practice as a Certified Internal Family Systems Therapist and Certified Daring Way™ Facilitator (Brené Brown, PhD’s training company), a systems theory thinker, and trauma-informed leader, I now support leaders like you who are making an impact in all spheres.
If you are here - reading this right now - you are a leader ready to level up your skill set to navigate your next big growth edge, a most recent curve-ball that took your breath away, or develop a new approach to those relentless inner critics and imposter experiences. Let's connect.